This is an excerpt from Erica Wiggenhorn’s book, Loving Your Wayward Child.
One of my favorite Bible characters is John Mark—also referred to simply as Mark in the Gospels. He eventually became a pillar of faith in the early church, even an author of one of our Gospels in the Bible, but his faith journey started out rocky. Mark had a devout mother, and she opened her home to the disciples in Jerusalem (Acts 12:11–12). When it came time for Paul and Barnabas to go on their first missionary journey, this young man had the opportunity to accompany them as their helper. This would have been a huge honor to be asked to serve Paul and Barnabas in this way.
However, not too long into the journey, Mark decided he wanted to go home. As they sailed along the Mediterranean shores of Greece and he saw the massive mountains that he would no doubt have to climb, he quit. This would have been a great loss to Paul and Barnabas in the middle of their missionary journey, having three sets of hands now down to two. If we read Acts 13 and 14, we realize this journey wasn’t exactly an island-hopping adventure with stays at the Hilton. This was hard work. They faced persecution and beating. Being forsaken in the middle of the journey most likely only added to their discouragement.
We know it affected them because when they decided to take another missionary journey, Paul adamantly refused to take Mark along. Barnabas wanted to give him another chance. It became such a point of contention that these two giants of the faith parted ways. Can you imagine being Mark’s mother? I would just love to be the parent of the child who fails to follow through when given the opportunity of a lifetime. My favorite is when the entire church is made aware of my child’s failings. Said no mom, ever. I don’t think it’s too far a reach to suggest she may have been more than slightly embarrassed. Luke doesn’t soften the narrative or do her any favors on that score. He says that Mark “deserted them” in the middle of the journey (see Acts 15:37–39).
At this moment, I imagine Mark’s mom needed her memorial stones. This was a tough moment. But there must have been something these two giants of the faith saw in Mark to invite his help in the first place. They could have chosen anyone for their helper. But they took him. And this also wasn’t the end of Mark’s story.
We don’t have any of the details in our Bibles, but we read something remarkable at the very end of Paul’s life. Right before he is about to be beheaded by the Romans, Paul writes these final words to Timothy: “Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me for ministry” (2 Tim. 4:11 ESV). Somehow this kid who quit grew to become part of Paul’s final four: Luke, Timothy, and Mark, gathered in person with Paul for some final words.
To visit Paul in prison was risky. Being associated with an insurrectionist against Rome was no small matter. Somehow this timid young man grew to become a man of great faith. Little did his mother know the mighty leader he would become. Maybe she sensed it—moms have a deep knowing about their children—but she certainly didn’t witness it that fateful day on the dock when her son deserted Paul and Barnabas and returned home.
I chuckle when I read Paul’s admonishment to the Philippians. It’s one of our favorite verses to put on coffee mugs, prayer journals, and T-shirts. And just like Mark who was overwhelmed or afraid, unable to persevere on that fateful missionary journey, the doubting and discouraged Philippians needed a faith boost too. So, from a prison cell Paul penned, “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Phil. 1:6 esv). I wonder if an image of Mark flashed before Paul in his mind as he uttered the words. I can’t wait to hear the rest of Mark’s story when I get to heaven. I also can’t wait to hear his mother’s side of it. But for today, let’s dial back our focus and remember, this is a moment in time in your child’s life—it doesn’t encompass all the moments. We have no idea what tomorrow may hold or how God may turn things around.
About Erica Wiggenhorn
Erica Wiggenhorn is an award-winning author and national speaker who loves to connect at retreats, large conferences, or her own kitchen table. Erica longs to bring scriptural truth and see lives transformed. A graduate and post-graduate of Azusa Pacific University, she wants people to discover delight in God’s Word as they become equipped with tools to read it with confidence. For free resources to accompany Loving Your Wayward Child visit ericawiggenhorn.com. Erica shares Phoenix life with her best friend Jonathan, and their four children– two of which are human and the others furry and adorable.
About Loving Your Wayward Child
Most books about wayward children are written after the happy ending. This one isn’t. Erica Wiggenhorn wrote Loving Your Wayward Child while still in the trenches—not knowing how her own story would turn out.
This is not a parenting advice book. You’ve already poured out every last drop of your parenting heart. This is a lifeline for your heart—biblical perspective, emotional tools, and practical strategies to help you stay spiritually grounded, emotionally healthy, and relationally connected to your child when both connections feel impossible.
