“Mom? Are you awake?”
Hilary’s whisper pulled me back into the hospital room and away from the image of her accident. I had dozed off against her bed rail. For the last 48 hours, all of my dreams had included her lying unconscious on Kenting Road in a pool of her own blood.
“I’m afraid I can’t do this,” Hilary quivered as she stared up at the ceiling. Immobilized by a neck brace and now traction, her pain medication couldn’t keep up with the pain of a cervical fracture. I watched as a tear escaped the corner of her eye and puddled into her ear.
Just yesterday, the China Medical staff had shaved Hilary’s temples and inserted two screws on either side of her skull. A U-shaped device was then attached to the screws and a series of weights and pulleys were fastened to reduce pressure to the base of her neck. Paralysis was still a possibility.
As I prayed and sang over Hilary, I too wondered if I would be able to get through the crisis. With my words, I encouraged and comforted. With my thoughts, however, I doubted and feared. My prayers often sounded much like this familiar verse: “If you can do anything, take pity on us, and help us!” (Mark 9:22)
Months later after a trip back to the United States, Hilary walked through surgical realignment. Dr. Cone reinforced Hilary’s neck vertebrae with titanium rods to give her greater neurologic stability. As our family walked through these days, I felt that I had been repositioned as well. The Great Physician strengthened my faith with His Word.
I had always visualized faith as a valuable object to be hoarded. Like an old spinster, I wanted to keep plenty of trust stuffed underneath my spiritual mattress just in case of need. But because emergencies might demand more than I had accumulated, I dreaded crises with gnawing anxiety.
Yet, the Lord revealed that faith is more like manna than money. Like the coriander wafer given to Israelites each morning, faith is apportioned to us fresh each day (see Exod. 16:16; Rom. 12:3). On the days of crisis, our faith fragment is significantly larger than on the days of comfort. It is apportioned to us according to our need. Like manna, we are to use it strongly and fully, to have none left over for the following day. He’ll provide for tomorrow just as He provided for today (see Matt. 6:34; Ps. 102:27). Hallelujah!
Journey, our devotional magazine, equips women to develop a daily walk with God and to serve Him in their homes, churches, and communities. Each month, we feature one of our Journey devotional writers here on the blog so you can get to know them a bit. Today’s post is from Kandy Persall. For more about Kandy and her story, check out her website: http://hungryformore.org/. The previous is an excerpt from her book, Hungry for More: Feasting through the Word.
