This article was originally published in Mature Living Magazine.
Suddenly, everyone is recording it—not just Natalie Cole, but also Amy Grant, Monica, Kelly Clarkson, Jane Monheit, and others. It’s a lovely song entitled “My Grown-Up Christmas List.” It wishes for “no more lives torn apart,” that “right would always win,” and that “love would never end.”
I second that, but those are lofty requests, and I’m not a lofty guy. They are worth wishing for—and praying for, especially—but they are out of my control. So, my grown-up Christmas list focuses on things that are much more down-to-earth and much more in my area of influence than that song by David Foster and Linda Thompson-Jenner.
You will find these things at the top of my grown-up Christmas list:
1. Peace in my heart.
Sure, peace on earth would be great, but it has to start somewhere, right? What better place to start than peace in my heart? (It even rhymes.) I wish for less stress in my life, more ability to let things go, fewer attempts at compulsive people-pleasing (on my part), and a serenity like that of Horatio G. Spafford (1873), whose faith still inspires hope today: “Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, it is well, it is well with my soul.” Making room for peace will mean spending time on what is important. Accomplishing that will probably mean saying no to some good things, even some things I would love to do. But since I can’t do it all (and trying to causes way too much stress), I will be better about saying, “I’d love to, but my calendar is full.”
2. Time with my children and grandchildren.
My wife and I enjoyed a fine holiday celebration last year with extended family, but I told my wife on the drive home that I was disappointed. Other than my wife, the people I most wanted to spend time with—my children and their families—hugged me hello and hugged me good-bye, and in between, we split up our time being with other people. Bummer. Instead of accepting every party invitation or holiday commitment that comes my way, I will reserve maximum time this Christmas for the best people I know—the perfect children my wife and I (OK, my wife mostly) managed to raise, as well as their spouses and children.
3. Time with my wife.
At the risk of being repetitive, a high priority for me this Christmas season is face time with my lovely bride (take that any way you want). But the holidays typically mean hard work for her—cleaning, decorating, cooking, baking, and more. This year maybe we will let Costco, Kroger, or the local bakery do more of the work and give visiting family members a small chore as they arrive at a gathering so that plopping down in front of a football game is not their sole contribution to the celebration.
4. A warm, mushy feeling.
My family’s Christmas celebrations have always included attempts to bless someone else. We support our church’s Angel Tree effort, purchasing gifts for the area children of prisoners. We ring bells for The Salvation Army. We try to make an anonymous cash donation to someone in need. We have visited nursing home patients. We do those things because they’re the right things to do and because I would want someone to do them for me. But, only once in a while have those efforts brought a tear to my eye or a lump to my throat. So, I will focus my efforts on things that are more “hi-touch” than “hi-tech,” things that reflect Christlike values in an often unChristlike world.
5. A Bethlehem experience.
My grown-up Christmas list includes an inner experience of the infinite reality: that moment when the living God of Christmas overwhelms the human soul with an awareness of His presence and prompts a passionate response. It’s what Ann Weems writes about in one of her poems in Kneeling in Bethlehem: “In the excitement and confusion, in the merry chaos, let’s listen for the brush of angels’ wings. This Advent, let’s go to Bethlehem and find our kneeling place.” It may happen spontaneously, of course, as it did for the shepherds on that first Christmas. But, I will also plan, like the Magi, to reach my kneeling place. I will seek it in corporate worship; I will wait for it in quiet prayer times; perhaps, I will hear it in a concert where angels show up.
There you have it. Those are the top five items on my grown-up Christmas list—right up there with peace on earth and goodwill to men…and maybe, also, a brand-new puppy.
What’s on your grown-up Christmas list this year?
BOB HOSTETLER is an award-winning writer from Ohio whose 30-plus books include The Red Letter Life: 17 Words from Jesus to Inspire Simple, Practical, Purposeful Living.