If you’ve been around teenage girls for any amount of time, you know they’ve got a lot going on. It’s really easy for a lot of us to shake our heads in disbelief and say, “It’s so much different now than when I was a teenager” and then not do anything to engage with these girls.
We’d rather pull back because we don’t know what to do when we could lean in during this season of life with a girl and her friends.What could happen if you decided to step into the mess of the teenage years again and walk alongside a teen girl? Scripture tells us that we’re supposed to pour into the next generation of women and disciple them. Will you step up to the plate?
You may be a mom navigating the teen years. Pray that God would not only equip you with what you need, but that other women would come alongside and speak the same truth to your daughter that you’re speaking over her. Some of the women who invested in me as a teenager were crucial to my spiritual formation because they affirmed what my parents were teaching me at home.
You may be called to love on some girls who don’t have parents who are pouring truth into them. Honor those girls and their parents by getting to know them and not overstepping the boundaries that their parents may put in place. Pray fervently that God would open doors for them to hear the truth of the gospel.
Here are a few ways to engage the hearts of young women:
1. Keep it simple
Don’t overthink spending time with teenage girls. They’re looking for real, authentic women who will speak truth into their lives. Don’t try to be their best friend (they probably already have one!) and just be yourself. They’re looking for someone who’s already walked the road they’re on, not for a peer.
2. Be intentional and available
Put it on your calendar! Text and keep up on a regular basis with what’s going on in their lives, but don’t hesitate to set boundaries to protect yourself and your family. If you’re a mom, when’s the last time you spent time just with your teen daughter doing something she wanted to do? Those moments won’t be forgotten.
3. Point her to Jesus
Our quick reaction is to share our own stories and experiences, but are you pointing her to Jesus? Are you showing her that He is the answer and the remedy to whatever is going on in her life? This step may seem easy on the surface but requires us to dig into Scripture and be faithful to what it says when it comes to our own lives. Teens can smell a hypocrite coming from a mile away and are more apt to listen if you’re living it out.
One last way to engage girls is to spend time with them. If you have a middle or high school girl in your life, I hope that you’ll consider bringing her (and her friends!) to the Lifeway Girls Conference this September. We’ll be in Nashville September 13-14 and in Dallas September 27-28. As you walk out your life in a way that honors God, the girls in your life will see it.
Mary Margaret West serves as the Girls Ministry Specialist for Lifeway Christian Resources, which basically means that teenage girls and the women who lead them are her favorite people on the planet. She has a passion to equip girls and women to dive deeply into God’s word and live out their calling, and does this by training, consulting, and speaking to women and student ministry leaders across the United States. Mary Margaret is the author of Show Her the Way: Your Guide to Discipling Teen Girls, is a former Girls Minister, and holds a master’s degree from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. She also hosts Lifeway Women’s {MARKED} Podcast. Mary Margaret and her husband Jonathan live in Franklin, TN. Connect with her online: @marymargaretc and girlsministry.lifeway.com.
