If any of y’all read my personal blog you know that I typically like to keep it light! and look for the funny! when I talk about my life. I just don’t write a lot of serious stuff – mainly because I try not to take myself too seriously.
But this week, in my homework for Anointed, Transformed, Redeemed: A Study of David, I was so moved by several of Beth Moore’s remarks that I couldn’t wait to share them with you – even if doing so requires me to step a little bit outside of my funny comfort zone.
Several years ago I was in the middle of what I thought was a pretty happy and carefree season of my life when I was blindsided by something that happened in my family. I felt like someone pulled the safety and security of my little world right out from under me, and I was devastated. I was angry. And I was positive that there was no way that God could ever restore what had been lost. On some level I thought God must have been trying to pay me back for every bad thing I’d ever done.
And apparently I’m not the only one who’s felt that way. Beth writes, “All of us, to varying degrees, have taken an unexpected, uninvited emotional dive…. Devastation always involves heartbreak, but a heart dropped from 90 feet shatters, splinters, and scatters differently than the one dropped from 10 feet…. We are simply and understandably unprepared.”
So given all that, it may seem a little strange to some people that I look on that very painful time and feel gratitude. Because while yes, it was ugly and miserable and sad, it was also a catalyst. With everything around me falling apart, I clung to my relationship with the Lord like I never had before. I grew in my relationship with the Lord like I never had before. And I walked out of that devastation with one single, sustaining revelation: He is everything.
Everything.
There’s no question that devastation – with God or with someone we love – can send us reeling. I’m sure that right now there are some of you reading this who are walking through circumstances you could have never imagined. So maybe it will encourage you to know that even though I would have never chosen what I went through several years ago, I am far enough on the other side of it to know one thing beyond a shadow of a doubt: I am grateful for it. God used that terrible time to show me more of who He is, to assure me that I can trust Him, to confirm that He is faithful.
That whole exchanging ashes for beauty thing? Well, He’s not kidding.
And now, when I look back on that family situation that was so heartbreaking, I am astounded by what God has done. There’s been healing and restoration like I could have never imagined. And there’s only One who could have done it.
Beth says, “Accepting the challenge to work through crisis and conflict can be a tremendously important part of developing closeness in a relationship. Don’t deny it. Don’t work around it. Don’t back up from it. Work right through the middle of it with your God. He has never left you. Never ceased loving you. And never shut off His goodness from you.”
Amen.
“Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good. His love endures forever.” – Psalm 136:1